Food is so much more than just fuel. We use food to celebrate, to comfort, to connect, and to show love to those around us. It's no surprise that we learn to connect food with emotions and eating from a very young age. When dieting enters the mix, it has a profound impact on our emotional well-being.  When we restrict and deprive ourselves of food, it increases the risk of using food to cope with emotions. This is just one more reason to reject the diet mentality and embrace a more intuitive way of eating. 

It's important to acknowledge that each act of eating in your life has served you in some way, in some cases this may have caused you to feel badly and resulted in physical discomfort. Eating fulfills some of our most basic needs for nourishment, comfort and pleasure. In some cases, eating may offer an escape from uncomfortable emotions, allowing us to temporarily numb our feelings. This can include a whole range of behaviours from restricting food (not eating) to overeating. 

Eating to Cope

Any behaviour you engage in for the purposes of escaping emotion, is a coping mechanism. There doesn't necessarily have to be drama or angst involved. We may use food to deal with prolonged stressful events, say... a global pandemic, a painful separation or caring for a sick loved one. But more often than not, overeating may be the results of just simply trying to cope with the minor irritations of ordinary life, like boredom.

How we were raised has a profound impact on our ability to cope effectively with life's ups and downs. If you were raised in a family where you were encouraged to speaking up, to show emotions, and to receive comfort from others, these are all positive coping strategies that make you better equipped to deal with life's challenges. If you were raised in a home where your parents or caregivers were emotionally distant, abusive or neglectful, or unable to cope with problems themselves, you may feel like you learned no other way to manage life's ups and downs and find yourself turning to unhealthy coping mechanisms as well.  When you throw dieting into the mix, you may find yourself compelled to seek comfort in eating, regardless of how you were raised. 

Detecting your vulnerability to eating problems: It might not be emotions!

Many people mis-label themselves as compulsive overeater because they have watched themselves over eat or binge. But before we can explore the emotional connections with eating, we first need to determine if non-attuned eating is actually the rooted in difficulties you may have in handling emotions. It's possible that overeating may be a consequence of lack of self-care or deprivation you feel from the lingering diet mentality.

Self-Care: Re-assessing the Basics 

It's difficult to eat with attunement and hear those subtle cues for hunger and fullness when self care is lacking. When you have been neglecting your basic needs, food becomes much more rewarding.  Key components of self care include; adequate sleep, life balance, nourishment and ability to cope with stress. 

Sleep 

According to the National Sleep Foundation, seven to nine hours is the optimal amount of sleep for adults. Without consistent, good quality sleep, most people are walking around feeling like a zombie. If you're feeling low on energy and lethargic, you may compensate by eating more.  While it's true that calories from food release energy when digested, eating more is not the best remedy for lack of sleep. Contrary to popular belief, eating doesn't wake you up- it actually makes you feel more lethargic and drowsy. If lack of sleep is contributing to your eating, we need to explore this further and look at strategies for improving your sleep duration and quality. 
SELF REFLECTION 
Think about your own sleep habits and reflect on the following questions: 
  • Do you turn off electronic devices early in the evening? Exposure to the light from screens stimulate brain activity and disrupt sleep quality. 
  • Do you set intention around going to bed at approximately the same time each night and waking up at the same time each morning- even on weekends?
  • Do you exercise during the day to promote better quality sleep?
  • Do you keep your bedroom cool for sleeping?
  • Do you avoid caffeine after the morning hours? Caffeine can stay in your system for up to 10 hours. 
  • Do you purposefully watch your alcohol intake? Although alcohol is a depressant, that initially makes you feel relaxed, there is loads of research to show it increases stress hormones and disrupts your body's natural ability to regulate sleep.

Life Balance 

At times in life we all feel overwhelmed. It may feel impossible to keep all the balls you're juggling in the air. This may be a feeling of abundance where you feel like there are so many things you want to do in a day, and there just isn't enough time to do them all. Or, it could be an abundance of life's problems. In either case, being realistic about how much time you can spend on any one area of your life is an important goal in helping you achieve better life balance. 
SELF REFLECTION 
Think about your own life balance and respond to these questions to help you identify where things may be out of balance for you.
  • Think about balance among the many aspects of your own life: work, play, family, movement, rest and relationships. Where could your life be out of balance (if at all)?
  • What could you do to reduce the time you spend on certain areas to help free up space for other areas that are not getting the attention they deserve? 

Nourishment

When you eat consistently and adequately, you will avoid entering into a state of primal hunger, which results in overeating when your brain senses semi-starvation. If you're struggling with this, it's important to back track and re-evaluate "Honouring your hunger" that we discussed previously. 
SELF REFLECTION
Reflect on the following questions to help you understand if nourishment might be an issue for you:
  • Do you eat at least 3 meals a day and 2 snacks a day, without going too long between eating?
  • Are you eating in a balanced way, meaning each meals contain a bit of protein, carbs and fat?
  • Have you recently increased your level of physical activity?
  • Did you start a new medication that may have increased your hunger?
  • Have you changed your pattern of eating? That is, have you started eating lighter meals or having a snack instead of a meal? 

​Stress

Everyone has stress. It's an unavoidable part of life. It may be a looming a deadline, moving, a divorce, financial problems, a health crisis, or the death of someone close to you. Whatever the source, stress has a serious impact on your health and overall wellbeing. It's no surprise that most people report a change in their eating habits when stressed.
SELF REFLECTION
  • What are the major sources of stress in your life?  
  • Consider ways that you might be able to manage that stress in a healthier way.
  • What might that look like for you? This might include getting emotional support from a friend or a professional, getting physical help (especially in moving), and practicing techniques to help you become more mindful and present to help you cope with your emotions when you feel overwhelmed. 
Stepping back to take time to look at the bigger picture of your life from all angles will help you identify problems that may be affecting your eating. Finding solutions to challenges you may face in any (or all) of these areas- is essential to progressing in your quest to eat with attunement. Without exploring these other areas of your life (sleep, nourishment, stress and life balance), you may mis-label yourself as an emotional eater, when in fact this is not true. ​​​​

​Download a PDF version of the self reflection exercises here.